I managed to weigh myself yesterday ... still 180. So camp wasn't so terrible for me as I imagined. Maybe getting sleep helped keep the pounds off. Ok, so if I'm in recovery (or supposed to be) I shouldn't be obsessing about my weight anyway ... but cleary I haven't grasped the whole recovery thing yet.
And how can I stay on track (taking proper care of my body) when I HATE it so much?!
I sabotage my recovery SO often and it seems the underlying voices that push me to that are telling me my body is not worth taking care of. It has betrayed me and is evil ... so why would I take CARE of it?! I don't seem to be able to convince myself that those voices are lying. "B" would tell me that any condemning voices are not from God as Romans clearly states "There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ". Ok, but what about the fact that I'm sinning when I over eat, and when I trust Ed's voice over God's ... ? What do I DO with that?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Hi Amy. I am glad the scale gave happier news to you. Experts say we should know when our bodies are full and we know when to "say no more". Being overweight myself, easier said then done when temptations surround you. But a positive interpretation I take from that - its learning to "read" or "listen" to your body. I would like to say after reading your entries you did just that. You listened to your body and "rest". As you mentioned, God gave you a wonderful blessing for 2 weeks - allowed special moments with the kids as well as allowed you time to "rest" as He brought you to a place where your cares were taken care of it. He knew what faced you at home, and the rest at camp helped prepared you for that too.
ReplyDeleteKnow that you are loved by God and those here on earth too.
For me, the biggest thing I noticed from your last two posts is that you were wrong about your weight gain. You felt, saw and thought you had gained a significant chunk of weight, but you hadn't. You weigh the same as you did a LONG time ago. So, you ARE in recovery. Celebrate this improvement Amy (but not with food!). Don't react to your perceived weight gain as if it was real - it turned out NOT to be real, reality is that you ARE doing better, your body IS recovering, the road is long, small victories are worth celebrating and you WILL get there.
ReplyDeleteYou're body is worth taking care of because it's the home God has given you to live in while you're here, and anyone that knows you is thankful that you're here. As you get healthier you'll even *feel* better living in the body you have. Keep posting, it helps me know what to pray.